baby step

Can't believe how idiotic I was yesterday.


Chance Chance Chance, I just let it go.

Oh whatever.

As a friend of mine said, I haven't been acting like this since the longest time ever. Like a whining baby.

No matter how hard I wanna deny that, I have to admit it. Yes I haven't been feeling like this for a while. A very loooooooooong while.

Some asked why, and it makes me wonders why. And I realise all I could say is IDK.

This feeling thing... , oh well.

Anyway, baby steps comon baby steps. So, teach me patient.

今わ。。。

Oh oh you know what.


this is really random but i guess that ’high school feeling’ i've been looking for kicks in again.


oh well. じゃね。

I promised this will be the LAST POST of archi crap

Tomorrow is gonna be the last day of the semester.

Can't believe time flew that fast, just THAT fast, you know. A moment ago it was just the beginning of the sem, and seriously are you kidding, i SURVIVED* thru the sem?

* NOTE: I am not too sure if I SURVIVED the sem, 'cause its clear that I haven't get graded for stuff, and final submission and exam are still ahead of me. but oh well, if you know how an architecture student semester is like, you would probably think SURVIVED is the word.


As you might realised what I wrote in the past few post, I am at the stage of 'where am i heading to in my life?' .

Mid life crisis.

I am 21.

Seriously.

Lets hope finger cross, 21 is not my mid life.

Btw, I realised architect sorta have shorter life span that others do. But well, they might already make every second worth it by staying up thru the night. They doubled their time spent with the life span given.

You might not get it. Lemme explain in simple math.

Ok. Let say this architect A and this clerk B both died at year 40 ( how sad ). Architect A actually use more of his time span than clerk B. So how this works is that:

Clerk B used life time = 40 (yr) x 365 (day) x 16 (active hr per day)= 262800 hrs
architect A used life time = 40(yr) x 365 (day) x 24 (active hr per day)= 350400 hrs

You see how the math works.



Ok enough crap. Thats totally irrelevant to what I was about to say when I start typing in this littlw column.


The fact that i just kinda got done with my final presentation makes me a little crazy. I am not used to have that much capacity in my mind.

Have been thinking bout the life direction stuff as I mentioned a hundred thousands word before . You might think its a little early to think about this, I am still a third year.

Well, it might not be an urgent to solve. It is just that, the thinking and FACT that i mighn't have been improving much or if there is any, from the day i stepped into the uni, is a little frustating and upsetting. Uni is making me stupid (I am seeking for agreement and support for the last sentence, please =)). What have I been doing in uni all these years. All nighters and essays and partying .?

Oh well, but you know what, when i was talking to a friend of mine about how impassionate i am about all this architecture crap, I realised i cannot picture myself in the future other than being an architect. So i guess I am still in afterall. =) POSITVE !

Blue sky

Sometimes life is just...

unpredictable.

What you told me explained my confusion over months. And I am filled with joy and positive momentum, that it eases your mind, and (fyi) it eases mine too.


Blue sky ♥

And as I read what I wrote...

And as I read what I wrote...

I thought I should be an architectural photographer.


because those are the people that deceive influence my young and innocent mind back then.

and I gotta say it's NOT that I regretted doing architecture. It is just that a lot had been going on.

live love life.

This Archi talk.

Why did I choose to do architecture in the first place.

why why why.

and i wonder what would I be doing instead if this stupid decision wasnt made.

I didn't choose architecture because it starts with 'A' and thus in the first page of the 'course selection' booklet.

I know I am a bad reader, but Seriously I didn't do that.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Architecture.

It attracted me and never cease to attract me. I loved architecture, and still love architecture.

It is just that, sometimes... I realised I didn't love architecture that much that I am prepare and willing to devote my life to it. That doesn't feel right.

Someone told me that s/he envy those that is willing to and are able to dedicate to architecture, even as young as a student.

I told him/ her that I don't, despite the fact that I envy people quite a lot ( and i do mean 'envy' and not similar negative substitute). I just don't see the meaning of this whole lifelessness and stuff, like how you treat your an hour nap as a precious god gifted break that you deserve after staying up for three thousand hours, or a peek on an episode of desperate housewife as the best entertainment ever after spending a week with yellow trace and no other thing.

And that people just have to have something else that they are passionate about.

even if it's dotA.


This is just plain emo crap.

and so, dear archies, no offence if you love your assignments.